Ear candles now in stock
Are you sure they're real nuns?
There were Goths in the Westgate Centre
Where people have sex in the public toilets
On Saturday afternoons
And the escalator hasn't worked for over twenty five years.
The Go Team were on the front of the Guardian Guide
And look depressingly like you would expect them to.
Happy, young and ethnically diverse
I can see them being used by New Labour
In the next election.
Except that the music starts promisingly
Doesn't really go anywhere.
There is probably an analogy to be drawn there
Am not going to make it
Call me a bitter and twisted bastard
But I cannot help notice the tendency of these
Happy multi-ethnic groups to
Only have white blokes
For people would be happy to have their children bring the girls home from college
Whereas black guys are scary
And asian ones might blow themselves up
At any moment.
Meanwhile, perhaps 'the secret of happiness'
Pages 11 to 12 of the Independent On Sunday
Is not to read
Global warming report
Pages 8 to 9
Excerpts from Robert Fisk's new book
'I told you it was going to be a huge fucking disaster'
on pages 16 and 17
By the way
Is a Simpsons reference
Rather than referring to 'our' Jeremy
Or cockney rhyming slang
Or may not
Have been 'reclaimed'.
By the way
The Semagic spelling checker
Suggests 'moths' for 'goths'
He was drawn like a goth to a flame
I like that.